Well the hubby left this morning to Singapore for a month! I either didn't really want to think about it before the day actually got here, or I was just in major denial cause I lost it so bad when I dropped him off at the airport. The worst part is seeing him say goodbye to his baby (Andrea, not me hehehe). She was all smiles, and just kept saying bye to him, and telling him she loves him, but I know just like last time she'll be asking for him by tomorrow.
I haven't been away from Beto for a month since I met him, and I was away in college. A month isn't a year, but it's still a long time for us. I can't imagine how military families do it, and I've got all that much respect for them. We will be only 2 1/2 months away from having this little man when he gets back. That's just crazy. The snow will be starting to melt, and the weather should be much warmer. I have a lot of keeping track to do of the new words and things Andrea is doing so I can tell him. I hope video chat makes this whole thing easier. I miss him like crazy already.
Sorry if I bore you guys with my blog for the next month cause it'll probably be sappy, and just talking about how wife misses hubby. Lol.
To top it all off as Andrea and I were walking in the house right now she spotted a plane and just yelled, "hiya Papa, I love you!" Ugh. So cute, but yet so heartbreaking in it's own way. That's it for now. Gotta bathe the little princess, and shoot her off to bed. I so need a drink tonite, but baby boy is kicking in there letting me know I've got a few months to wait for that drink. It's all worth it!
Friday, January 28, 2011
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Another son!
So we FINALLY found out the sex of this bean inside of me. It's another boy for us. We had been told at our 16 week u/s that it's most likely a boy, but at the 20 week u/s he was sorta looking like a she, but they didnt wanna confirm either way. So on Monday we finally confirmed that bean is definitely a he.
It's one of those bittersweet moments. Your life sort of revolves around your loss. I know this little guy will never replace Gabriel or be Gabriel, but something inside of me feels like he will carry a part of who Gabriel would've been. There's also that excitement of this little one being a boy, because well unfortunately, I know there are no guarantees that there will be another baby. I want another baby, but I'm not sure if that's going to happen.
For right now I'm just enjoying being almost 24 weeks pregnant, and all the aches and pains that come with it. As hard as it can get, I'm glad I have that appreciation now for every ache and pain. Makes having this baby born all that much more special.
It's one of those bittersweet moments. Your life sort of revolves around your loss. I know this little guy will never replace Gabriel or be Gabriel, but something inside of me feels like he will carry a part of who Gabriel would've been. There's also that excitement of this little one being a boy, because well unfortunately, I know there are no guarantees that there will be another baby. I want another baby, but I'm not sure if that's going to happen.
For right now I'm just enjoying being almost 24 weeks pregnant, and all the aches and pains that come with it. As hard as it can get, I'm glad I have that appreciation now for every ache and pain. Makes having this baby born all that much more special.
Friday, January 7, 2011
March of Dimes 2011!!
We are again participating in the March of Dims walk this year in Chicago. I hope to be able to raise at least $500, and get an even bigger team this year. I had a great time doing the walk last year, and it was very emotional when I got to the finish line. We do it in memory of Gabriel, but more than anything in hopes that one day no mother has to ever suffer through a loss.
Doing the walk and raising the money for such an important organization has been amazing, and I hope to keep doing it year after year. We miss Gabe dearly, and just to know that our participation may help save one baby is worth walking a million miles. I'm excited for this years walk, and look forward to seeing everyone again!
Doing the walk and raising the money for such an important organization has been amazing, and I hope to keep doing it year after year. We miss Gabe dearly, and just to know that our participation may help save one baby is worth walking a million miles. I'm excited for this years walk, and look forward to seeing everyone again!
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Finally
We finally told EVERYONE 2 days ago about my pregnancy. We waited 20 weeks and 5 days, and that's about 20 Weeks sooner than we had been shooting for. Lol. Our parents and siblings knew since about 8 weeks, but we decided to hold off on telling most everyone else until this point.
Not having told extended family about the pregnancy is one of the biggest reasons I've laid off blogging as much as I used to. I've got so much to say, but I knew I couldn't since some of my family reads it. It's been a rollercoaster of emotions, and I'm sure there are so many more to still come.
There has been lots of excitement, lots of hope, and lots of prayer. There has also been a ton of constant worrying, caution, and trying not to get to attached. I've learned that I can't help but get attached, and the pain would be no less than if I did get attached, and lost this child too. I'm thankful to God that so far things are looking really good.
I miss the innocence of pregnancy before a loss, but I'm also grateful that I understand the beauty and miracle that every pregnancy is. I feel like I appreciate what is happening inside my body so much more this time around. There are so many other emotions that go with this pregnancy, but I'll leave that for another blog.
Not having told extended family about the pregnancy is one of the biggest reasons I've laid off blogging as much as I used to. I've got so much to say, but I knew I couldn't since some of my family reads it. It's been a rollercoaster of emotions, and I'm sure there are so many more to still come.
There has been lots of excitement, lots of hope, and lots of prayer. There has also been a ton of constant worrying, caution, and trying not to get to attached. I've learned that I can't help but get attached, and the pain would be no less than if I did get attached, and lost this child too. I'm thankful to God that so far things are looking really good.
I miss the innocence of pregnancy before a loss, but I'm also grateful that I understand the beauty and miracle that every pregnancy is. I feel like I appreciate what is happening inside my body so much more this time around. There are so many other emotions that go with this pregnancy, but I'll leave that for another blog.