2 months

Dear Gabriel,

It's been two months today since you had to leave us. I miss you with all my heart and soul. They say that time heals everything, but it seems that time is only making this wound deeper. I think of you each and everyday. Somedays I smile and other days I cry hard for you. I know you are in a much better place, and that you were just too much for this evil world. I know that God called you home way before your time for a reason. I guess he just needed an other angel to make Heaven that much more beautiful. I miss you so much, and I often wonder what you would be like. I wonder if you would be such a good baby like your sister Andrea or if you would be the one to keep us up all night. Not that either one would matter because I'd love you no matter what. I wonder what it would be like to be 7 months pregnant while chasing down your sister day in and day out. I wonder how much clothes I would have piled up just for you, and how many pairs of Air Jordan's I would buy you in your lifetime. I wonder if you'd grow up to be a baseball star or play an instrument. I wonder about a lot of things, and I guess that's all I'll ever be able to do.

There is something I dont ever wonder about. I dont ever wonder if Andrea would love you like no other. I know she would be head over heals for you, and barrage you with kisses and hugs all day long. She would fall in love you just as fast as I fell in love with you. Gabriel I miss you with all I've got, and I love you with all I've ever had, all I have, and all I'll ever have. I promise to never forget you, and I'll carry you with me wherever this life may take me. You will always be my first son, and you will always be the missing link in my life. How I wish you could have been even for just one moment. I would do anything in this life just to feel you kick inside of me, see you move even if the result were the same. Just to have you for one more minute to love and to hold deep inside of me. I love you more than anyone will ever know. Please watch over us, and feel our love for you from all the way down here. Mommy will NEVER ever forget you, and I will never stop missing you. I love you my baby boy, I love you more than words can ever describe.